I love this excerpt from Stila founder Jeanine Lobell's interview on Into the Gloss:
"When I was eighteen, my dad was visiting me in New York and he said to me, ‘Honey, see that guy over there, with the hot dog stand? There’s nobody standing there, telling him to spread the mustard this way, or that’s how much relish to use. You need to get your own hot dog stand.’ I think that I’m lucky that my dad knew that I just couldn’t function like that—that I was never going to be able to work in a traditional job. I’m lucky though, because most parents would be like, ‘What the hell, you can’t even keep a job?’ So I would say that I’m very lucky that he just knew who I was, and didn’t have a problem with it."
But I especially love that last line, as that's the really the magic bullet, don't you think? This ability to really know your children's characters -- their habits and passions and interests and then helping them become the best possible version of themselves (rather than trying to mold them into exactly who *you* want them to be) is just huge.
I hope I can pull that off with my girlies...
14 comments:
Oh man.....AB-SO-LUTE-LY. So my mantra with my girls...So want to always embrace and celebrate who THEY are. ( which is pretty frickin amazing) and not who I think they should be. Love this....
xo
Melis
I adore being the mom of a girl. I have so much fun.
LOVE. An awesome reminder. It is so much fun to watch these little people grow into big people, but it can be tempting to put our own stuff on them. Allowing them to be themselves is the best gift we can give them.
Love this post!
I couldn't agree more. I felt a lot of pressure to be who my parents wanted me to be, and I so want to do things differently with my own children. I hope that I can see who they are clearly to give them such good advice when they need it.
Thank you for sharing this!
This is really good. Thanks for sharing. I am hesitant to say magic bullet though, I am not sure there is one when it involved human emotions.
Wow, your father's words are powerful and so wise. I hope to teach the same to my son one day.
Such an important reminder...your awesome Joslyn!
Thank you for your words... So right on...
Oh wow. When I was in graduate school and hating every single minute of it, I envied the hot dog stand lady at the school. I know she had her own share of problems, but she was free to make her own decisions. 10 years in the traditional work force and I'm finally out, hoping to start my own business soon! It's never too late! I hope I can teach my girls to do what they love, and not worry about fitting into a mold. Thanks for the reminder!
Isn't this the truth! We are only helping to grow and cultivate our children so that they can blossom into who they were meant to be. My in-laws knew that and encouraged my husband's inherent artistic interests from the age of 4. He and I met in art school and now he makes a living for our family of 5, as an artist. How cool to be encouraged to be yourself, right?!
amen! what a great quote. i need to print that out so i can see that everyday as a parent of twin girls. your posts on parenthood are fabulous.
Actually, I wonder if you could ever know the true character of anyone. Sometimes, you need to have the faith and courage to let your kids follow their own dreams... and support them 100% even if your heart is quaking and your knees are shaking... :)
That's great advice your father gave you. This world is made up of all different kinds of people, and it's amazing a parent can see their children for who they are and not try to change them.
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